Thursday, November 5, 2009

My list of demands...

I feel sorta bad for my Chinese friend and the HCPs she has to interview for me. Here's a copy paste of my email to her.

"Thank you again for helping me with this. I am apologizing in advance for how difficult this might be.

1st preference: Home birth attended by midwife/doctor who is comfortable allowing me to labor on my own with no IVs or constant monitoring. Fetal heart tones can be taken at regular intervals by doppler. After birth, baby will not go to the hospital. No injections, medications or supplements will be given to the infant in the case of a normal delivery. As far as pregnancy care, I do not want more than 2 ultrasounds the entire pregnancy. I will not have vaccinations or shots. In the case of afterbirth complications, I will allow injections of pitocin ( to start uterine contractions. This was necessary at Q's birth). After birth, I want to be allowed to breastfeed on demand and to be left alone as much as possible.

If there is no caregiver willing to attend at home, I will consider a hospital setting but only with the expectation that is to be uninvasive and as much LIKE a home delivery as possible. No monitors, no IVs, no medications. Baby does NOT leave my room without a parent in attendance EVER. After birth, I want to be allowed to breastfeed on demand and to be left alone as much as possible.

Not sure what the post partum follow up standard of care here is, so any info you can get on that would be appreciated. Also, as far as newborn exam being required, I want it performed with me or Donnie present.

Let me know if you have any follow up questions."

I am sure they are going to think that I am off my rocker, but here's hoping she has luck at the private hospital that has a lower C-section/intervention record and are more likely to facilitate my "demands".

The good thing in my favor is that, in China, money in the right hands can get you a lot of things that aren't easy or... sometimes legal.


Sarah R said...

I hope you can get something figured out! At least you have time. I guess we are lucky here to have so many other options (although in my area, it is pretty much unheard of to not deliver in the hospital, unless you are Amish).

Hollie said...

I really hope you can find a provider that you will be comfortable with. You may have to compromise on some things, but to find a caring, honest, dr or midwife would be wonderful.

I know with my hospital birth experience, things didn't really go my way, but in the end, we went home with a precious little boy.

Birdee said...

Sounds nerve racking trying to find and trust the right place and people. I would be very nervous in your shoes.

Anonymous said...

Good luck getting your requests met, Jessi, and congratulations on the new pregnancy!

I've been reading your blog for a while and have been wondering something. I'm guessing you and Donnie don't intend to become Chinese citizens, and therefore won't be subject to the infamous "one child" policy in China. But does the policy and/or the culture that has resulted from it made things more challenging for you? Do you expect to get some stares when you and Donnie are walking around with two kids? (A friend of mine who is a mother of three is planning to move to China in the spring. During their orientation, they were told to be prepared for that kind of thing.)


Fishsticks and Fireflies said...

I hope that you are able to find a care provider who will accomodate your wishes. Is the high rate of C-sections related to the restrictions that were placed on the number of children allowed (opting for a surgical delivery so that tubes could be tied)? It is just so odd for a nation that places such emphasis on more traditional and holistic therapies!

Emmysmom said...

Ive never been to China, but Im wondering why they would ever think your off your rocker bc of those requests? Women had babies for centuries on their own with little assistance, however its nice to have the back up in case something critical were to happen. I hope you get your "demands" met, and I hope you feel better soon. Dont worry too much about Q watching a little tv, some shows are educational and YOU need your rest!!

Tara said...

None of that seems overly crazy or demanding to me - of course I realize you are in China where things are very different than they are here in North America.

Good luck, I hope you find someone who will willingly meet your list of demands.