Color me crestfallen...

Yeah. Nothing for us. No visits with family. Nope.






I knew better than to get my hopes up... Some people never learn.

I'm feeling queasy.

Donnie is currently at the tournament, likely performing, or preparing to do so.

I won't really hear from him until tonight, and, honestly, the waiting is going to give me a heart attack. I am so nervous for him, it is making my stomach knot up.

Nerves...

Please send prayers and positive thoughts Donnie's way. In less than 8 hours he will be competing.

Thanks.

Goose!

I've been tagged by Sarah. I won't lie. I'm lazy and this feels a lot like work right now. I am currently enjoying my first quiet moment since my sister took Quinlon over to a neighbor's house for a bit.

Random facts about moi:

1. I once sang the national anthem at an NBA basketball game.

2. I am addicted to Cadbury Cream Eggs. If they were sold year round, it is likely I would weigh 50 lbs more than I do now.

3. I can't sleep at night unless I put lip balm on. More specifically, Burt's Bees chapstick.

4. I am completely co-dependent on Donnie. When he's not here, I count the minutes until he will get home and when he is away I walk a fine line between being ok and having constant nervous breakdowns.

5. I am a true geek at heart. Comic books, Star Wars, Discovery Channel, the whole nine yards.

6. I have a photographic memory, but a terrible chronological memory.

7. I'm over 1/8th Cherokee.

I tag...

Shayna
Lilah
Stephanie
Joellen
Nikki
Hell, I can't think of 2 more. I'm fricking tired.

Stuntman Quin

I should have taken it as a sign when I got grey hairs when he was still inutero.

3 falls in 4 days.

Sunday night he flipped backwards off the bed and clipped his head on the bedside table.

He cried and cried and once we was calm, I cried just as hard as he did.

Then today, he was laying across my legs and he THREW himself off my lap and onto the tile floor. Unlike the first mishap, this one left a rather large goose egg on his noggin. We recovered nicely after some cuddles and nursing...

Fast forward a few hours. Yes, a few hours when Quinlon inch worm crawled his way off the bed during naptime. He missed all hard objects and landed on a pillow that had fallen off before him. Stopped crying the moment I picked him up.

I have a daredevil on my hands. With me sitting right there he tries to scoot head first off the edge of things. So, the issue of not having a place for him to sleep other than my bed has become top priority. I will be getting the previously mentioned co-sleeper this weekend.

Until then... I will be growing many more grey hairs, I'm sure.

*grumble grumble*

This "single mother" stuff is for the birds. I don't know how mommies survive without another parent involved. I totally worship the ground you walk on, single moms.

Quinlon is teething/cluster feeding and driving me batty. Not to mention that he is getting better at creeping/crawling everyday which has made naptime interesting.


Good news? I found an Arm's Reach Cosleeper for $60. She is going to hold it for me until this weekend when I have to go to DFW anyway. Hooray for no more falling off the bed. This also means Donnie and I get to sleep in the same bed for the first time in WEEKS. OMG. That is exciting stuff, ladies and gentleman.

Holy Flashback!

It is weird as hell to talk to Donnie on Yahoo Messenger. With a few exception for business trips and such, Donnie has always been a room away (or at least within shouting distance) since we met and rode off into the sunset together.

His flight was good and our 5 hour round trip drive to and from the airport, uneventful. Quinlon is constantly surprising me with how well he handles situations that I assumed would be a struggle. Just another sign he is growing up. Le sigh.

We did bananas the other day. Quinlon had a blast. Here's the video, but it's something like 8 minutes long, so I don't blame you if you skip it. Although, there are some golden snippets in there like "Put it on the table... no, not him, the bananas." LOL

And don't mind the shirtless Donnie. The running joke is that he doesn't own any shirts since more often than not, he is shirtless in all pics/video.

Sadsauce.

Donnie leaves for New York in the AM. We've got to get up bright and early at 4AM and drive to Dallas.

Donnie is competing in an invitation only kung fu master's tournament on Friday and Saturday. He has more than a good chance of winning. I am so proud of how hard he has been training and am praying so hard he does well.

First prize is a sword worth $10,000 and $5,000 cash. If he wins we are going to fly up to meet him so Quinlon can meet his Grandpa and his godmother. If you think about it, please pray for him to do what he was born to do and be the best.

Le sigh. I hate when my other half is away.

Well, I'll be damned.

Quinlon is growing up.

Who knew so much happened at 6 months? I sure didn't.

Thanks, Steph for the links to baby led weaning. I am not sure why I hadn't heard of it and now that I spent several hours poring over all the info out there, I am in love with this method of solid feeding.

Matter of fact, we are going to let him try some avocados tonight and see what he does since he has been so interested in what we are eating.

Then I realized that this means I need to get him sippies. He spent 20 minutes earlier drinking from my glass and actually swallowing half of it while the other half he dumped down his shirt.

Where has time gone????

So. Now I need BPA free sippy cup recommendations. A few people have said the straw style ones are easier at first. Any opinions?

::EDIT::

I got tons of input via email and a message board I am on and fortunately, Nuby sippies are all BPA free and dirt cheap! YAY! We have 2 on the way here now.

If there is one thing motherhood has taught me...

It's that every time you think you have things figured out, your child will throw you a nasty curve.

We had a rough night. It's bound to happen from time to time, but it doesn't make me any less groggy and half frazzled. I'm not even sure why he woke up screaming, but he managed to throw his paci in the gap at the head of the bed and I had to crawl around on the floor half naked trying to squeeze myself under there to retrieve it.

Sorta funny in retrospect.

It's really a good thing he is cute, because otherwise, he might be fending for himself. (I kid, I kid, but I am now fully aware of the meaning of "no days off").

I gotta get back to struggling to eat my toast while Quinlon tries to climb up my arm and steal my food.

Men are assholes.

Let me preface this by acknowledging that I realize I can be a pain in the ass and I have my moments of bullheaded obnoxiousness.

But what is it about men that makes them think it is ok to be a total dick and justify it by explaining that it is "the way I am"?

And of course, because I love him... I yell and fume and then let it go and love him still.


Le sigh.

Randomness...

Donnie leaves for a King Fu tournament in NY on Wednesday so we are taking the weekend to have family time.

Donnie let me sleep in this morning and then Quinlon came to bed for his first nap and we slept together so I didn't get up until 11AM this morning. Sooooo wonderful.

I took tons of stash pictures of my yarn for my ravelry. It's looking a bit sad with so few yarns in my stash. I took Quinlon outside with me and sat him on a blanket and brought out his favorite toy and he had a blast. I took 49 pictures. He was being such a good subject, i couldn't resist.

A lot on my mind...

I sat here and stared at the flashing cursor for at least 5 minutes. Geeze. I feel like there's an angry ant hill in my head and someone just poked a stick in it.

So instead of rambling, here are some recent pictures from our life.

Quinlon likes to take sips of water or white tea from our cups. He will spill it trying to snatch the cup from you.



My boys



Here's a video of him sitting up on his own!

Sleep training 101.

It's ridiculous that this information is not available to new moms. Sure. You can go buy a book, but why the hell are we paying for information that experienced mothers should be passing down?

I'm fortunate. My good friend, Jessica, has 4 girls so she has been around the block so to speak. I went to her in tears after a night where Quinlon refused to go to bed until 2 AM and then woke up hourly. Before we started the training, it was normal for Q to nurse to sleep for hours before he would let me put him down around midnight. The hours were killing me and I finally couldn't take it anymore.

The method we used was a version of the "Happiest Baby on the Block" but minus the crying it out. I refuse to let my child scream alone in the dark. It just seems so cruel especially since this is the age where many babies develop separation anxiety. Quinlon is very very attached to me and it breaks my heart to even think of not comforting him when he is upset. With his temperment, CIOing is just not a good option because he has such a short temper that even brief crying without response turns into all out SCREAMING.

But, I digress.

The important points were this:

-Establish a bedtime routine that will signal to him that it is bedtime and give him some winding down time.

-Break the association of eating with sleeping. He was so used to nursing when he was sleepy, he had associated sleeping and eating as one feeling.

-Watch carefully for baby's sleepy signs and start naptime/bedtime routine at the early signs. Waiting to long will just make them harder to put down to sleep.

-Be consistent.

The first 2 days, Donnie was in charge of naptime and bedtime because as a breastfed baby, I smell like food to him.

Our routine was lay him down, give him the paci and his blankie and then pat until he settled dozed off. For the first day or two, naps were tough right along with bedtime.

After day 2, naps got much easier, but were only 45 minutes long because that is how long a sleep cycle is and Quinlon had not yet learned how to soothe himself back to sleep.

Bedtime was still harder, but the prep for it was much more intense. To get him "tanked up" so he would sleep, we would cluster feed from about 2 hours before bedtime until just before we started our routine for bed. So every 30-45 minutes I offered the breast and even if he just nursed for a minute or two, let him nurse as he wanted.

Then, 15 minutes before the time we wanted him in bed, we start our routine of singing to him as we change him into his night diaper and pajamas, then we read a book, then he gets hugs and kisses from Ba-ba(Donnie) and hugs and kisses from Ma-ma. Then lay him down, give the paci and blankie and pat until he falls asleep.

At first, he would wake up so many times. We never picked him up unless he was really upset. If just fussing, we patted until he settled back down and then left the room. The first week, it was soooo hard. He woke up constantly and he would cry because he wanted to nurse himself to sleep.

Now, he still wakes up sometimes, but it's usually because he lost the paci and will go right back to sleep with minimal patting, and naptimes now usually last at least 90 minutes, but as long as 3 hours because he can soothe himself back to sleep in between sleep cycles and are fairly fight free.

It turns out that nursing to sleep is a bad idea because milk in the tummy at bedtime can cause gas and increased spitting up. Sure enough, he is so much less gassy and spits up almost never now.

Because we co-sleep, Quinlon still nurses 3x a night (he sleeps nearly 12 hours, though). Since we have a routine, when I do decide to cut out a feeding, the transition will be smooth.

I think that is everything... LOL

I never get things like this.

<3

I guess that is just a sign I need to be more active in the blogiverse.


I have been awarded the SMILE award, created by Laura, and generously bestowed upon me by my sister from another mister, Nicole

Characteristics for the Smile Award:
1. Must display a cheerful attitude.
2. Must love one another.
3. Must make mistakes.
4. Must learn from others.
5. Must be a positive contributor to blog world.
6. Must love life.
7. Must love kids.

These are the rules for The Smile Award.
1. The recipient must link back the the award’s creator
2. You must post these rules if you receive the award.
3. You must chose 5 people to receive the award after receiving it yourself.
4. You must fit the characteristics of the recipient of the award, as posted by Mere.
5. You must post the characteristics of a recipient.
6. You must create a post sharing your win with others.

So hard to choose, but I must persevere! LMAO

Shayna My BFF and the most generous loyal lady I know. She has struggled with infertility for over 3 years but managed to stay by my side after I got pregnant and gave birth to our son despite the personal pain it must cause her. She is a trooper and the best godmother a little boy could ask for and one day, she will be a wonderful mother herself.

Stephanie - This mama is not only an awesome mom, talented photographer, and great friend, she has weathered quite the storm in the last year. Losing her father, her house, her dog, but never her faith or her smile. She has been there for me in moments of panic without hesitation despite her own heavy load.

Lilah - She's following me!! Ok, not really, but we both just experience pregnancy and motherhood, she just a month behind me... She is also a wonderful mommy and always on some adventure. She always seems to have positive things to say, even when "Chicken" is refusing to sleep or has shit out his diaper and up his back.

Aimee (and Brian, the dark horse knitter) - Fellow hippies with one of the most beautiful little girls I've ever seen. I love the kindredness we have over so many lifestyle choices, plus who doesn't love looking at pictures of Delilah and "aww"ing.

Joellen - A recent reading find that makes me happy!! It's always a joy reading her posts and I love peeking into her life as a fellow "hippy" She is a mommy-extraordinaire and balances a work life (soon) as well.

Phew, that was hard. Happy reading everyone!

On a positive note...

Quinlon is feeling much better. Still congested, but it's no longer interfering with nursing and sleeping. And even at his sickest, he still slept at night with his usual routine. I am so glad we did the sleep training before he got sick otherwise, it would have been a trainwreck.

Now, if we can just cut that tooth that has been giving us fits for the last month and a half.

At the request of a few people, I am going to provide some links about vaccination. This is such a sticky topic and rarely do I even bother to discuss it because of reactions much like Anonymous. It's hard to see that just because a doctor has an MD after their name does not mean that they are not being given the same propaganda as you are. Of course they push vaxes since they are TAUGHT to push them.

Anyway, enough of my soapbox for now. I would rather educate than preach.

http://www.vaccinationdebate.com/web5.html - This page also has about 5 links to other information pages at the bottom.

http://www.naturalnews.com/022617.html

http://www.whale.to/vaccines/butler3.html

http://www.vaclib.org/


And the ingredients...

http://www.wnho.net/vaccine_ingredients.htm

My my, aren't we an idiot?

In fact, so much stupidity abounds in this comment, I felt the need to address it and clarify some points that seem to be muddy for anyone assuming that my beliefs mean anything other than what I have clearly stated.


"Anonymous said...

You are right...vaccines DONT work. Thats why there are SOOO many people in the US dying of whooping cough, measels, mumps and polio. And thats why those diseases are not around anymore. Because of all the vaccines that are out there. But you probably know more than all the millions of Drs out there. And as far as hating here.....I dont think you will find another country in this world that will tolerate your mouth the way the people in the US will. Have you thought that maybe all of your country bashing may offend the people that fought for your right to run your ignorant mouth to begin with. Grow up!"


"You are right..."
- Glad you finally see that. :-D

"vaccines DONT work. Thats why there are SOOO many people in the US dying of whooping cough, measels, mumps and polio. And thats why those diseases are not around anymore. Because of all the vaccines that are out there. But you probably know more than all the millions of Drs out there."

- Please, do some research. These diseases do exist. They have not been eradicated as you seem to think. It's not vaccines that have reduced them to such a low occurrence level, it's better sanitation and diet allowing our immune systems to do what they do best.

"Thats why there are SOOO many people in the US dying of whooping cough, measels, mumps and polio. And thats why those diseases are not around anymore."

- Make up your mind. Are "SOOO many people dying" or are these diseases "not around anymore"? ::insert eyeroll::

"And as far as hating here..."

- There you go putting words in my mouth. I don't hate here. I hate the way things are going and the way the leaders are running the country into the ground. It isn't hard to google "bilderberg conference" or "eugenics" and see what I mean.

"...I dont think you will find another country in this world that will tolerate your mouth the way the people in the US will."

- Oh yes, because world opinion of the USA is sooo stellar right now. You're funny, are you a comedian?

"Have you thought that maybe all of your country bashing may offend the people that fought for your right to run your ignorant mouth to begin with."

- Have I once bashed what the principles this country was founded on? Have even whispered a word of disdain for our brave armed forces? I disagree with CURRENT policies and leaders decisions. That has NOTHING to do with the personal sacrifices that the military personnel have given over the years. My dad is a veteran. He has many of the same views I do. It makes him just as sad to see things going downhill the way they are.

You might want to watch who you call ignorant. I have done my research. Hours and hours of it and come to my PERSONAL conclusions. I am not pushing them on anyone. I am not forcing anyone to even read them. You read all this by choice and now have the moronic gall to tell me I have no right to my own feelings? Isn't that what those soldiers are fighting for? The right to free speech and believing as you please? Yeah. Pretty sure that is one of those nice little ideals they risk their lives to preserve.

I won't be publishing anymore of your comments, matter of fact, I won't even read them. They have been such an epic waste of my time. You have done nothing but prove what an ignorant, blind, uneducated, Wisconsin housewife you are. And, while I have enjoyed watching you make a fool of yourself, this is MY blog and I am tired of bothering with you.

Sick baby = teh suck

Quinlon's picked up a cold from my little brother. Thanks, Chance! :|

Nothing too terrible, just congestion. But it's hard to nurse when you can't breathe through your nose. Not that I know from personal experience, but it's funny in a sad sort of way to watch him suck frantically then pull away and pant to catch his breath.

Lately, Quinlon has taken a liking to my sister's dog, a Jack Russell, named Taz. She's a sweet dog, if a bit neurotic and is obsessed with licking his face. He likes to grab her ears and hold her paws. It's rather cute to watch.

Alls quiet on our side of the mississippi but Ike will be hitting way south of us soon. We'll probably just get heavy rain and some wind. So nothing to be too concerned about really, but I'll keep everyone updated.

Realizations are funny.

In trying to keep my blog neutral, it seems I've painted myself into a corner and have issues finding anything to blog about since I tend to want to edit out my more controversial beliefs.


Then I thought about it. It's my blog, who the fuck am I trying to keep happy? It hasn't been me. So, from now on, my blog will be about our life, of course, but also about all the issues the grind my gears and give me passion to speak out.

Phew. Glad all that bullshit is out of the way.

Now, the good stuff. Intrigued yet?

The real me hates "modern" medicine and hasn't seen a "real" doctor in years.

The real me doesn't take medicine unless there is NO other option.

The real me doesn't touch high fructose corn syrup, sodium stearyl lactylate, hydrogenated (partially or not) oils, aspartame, sucralose, or any other artificial sweetener.

The real me does not eat dairy. At first, because of Quinlon's reflux issues and now because I refuse to put hormones meant to grow a calf into a 600 lb cow into my body. No wonder I couldn't lose weight for so long.

The real me is anti government. They do NOT have our best interests at heart. They do NOT care about our financial welfare. They do NOT care about us AT ALL. We are slaves to then. Cheap labor and hosts for them to drain resources from.

The real me is a huge breastfeeding advocate.

The real me refuses to let a disposable diaper touch her children and is sad that those chemical filled pieces of shit are even an option.

The real me is a professional knitter.

The real me prefers to buy handmade despite the price difference than cheap mass produced crap.

The real me wishes we had the money to buy ONLY handmade and weren't forced to buy mass produced crap sometimes.

The real me will never vaccinate her children. The truth is out there and I refuse to put poisons in my children.

The real me is sad for all the people who believe what they are told.

The real me is glad to be leaving this country because the shit is about to hit the fan.

The real me knows September 11th was orchestrated by the U.S. Government.

The real me is not popular nor do I fit in.


I am ok with it.



From today on, I will use my blog to share the things that are important to me and the things that make the real me, the real me.

The real me is a bitch with lots of unpopular convictions.