Tuesday, October 21, 2008


October sucks.

October 2006 = EDD of our dear Evelyn. Yeah, that was a shitty Halloween. I got so trashed I don't remember it. I still feel guilty for that. I was hiding from the pain in a handle of Jack Daniels.

October 2007 - Donnie's aunt (who was like a second mother to him) died.

October 2008 - Donnie's best friend since 4th grade hangs himself in his basement widowing his 7 month pregnant wife.


There really are no words for this. Donnie flew to NY to be with the family. He was family to them. He said it was the hardest thing in his entire life to see his friend's father break down and sob like a baby.

It really hits far too close to home for me. My boyfriend in HS shot himself in the head. I was the one who found him. I also missed his phone call, possibly his cry for help, my chance to save him. It regurgitates so many raw feelings that I thought I had left behind.

But, damn, it makes me appreciate my beautiful husband and amazing son. Certain aspects of my life are complete and utter shit right now, but I wake up to two beautiful boys and I can't really say that I NEED more.

Hug your loved ones tightly. They are the most precious things in this world.


Poltzie said...

Fuck Jesse, that is horrible! I am so so so sorry.
We are all so lucky for what we have, thank you for this reminder!
(((BIG HUGS)))
Thinking of your family today!

MrsDrink said...

Oh hunny, please give big hugs to DH for us! Hugs to all of you! I can't even begin to imagine...


Queen Bee said...


there is nothing to be said that will take the hurt away, but I am so sorry to hear this. the folks touched by this will be in my prayers today.

Jewels said...

I'm so sorry to hear that, how devastating. I can see why October sucks.

I just wished if someone was having suicidal thoughts, they could have kids first so they could know how much our parents love us.
But then again, our neighbor hung him self last year and he had 5 kids, so while that may not stop some of us. I think to love a child and know we too are that loved would save many of us. I look in my sweet son's eyes and thank god I never acted upon those stupid thoughts before he came along.
I will hold my family close today and think of you and pray for your friend's family.

Sarah R said...

I am so sorry. That is horrible....